Only Memories Are Left, The Fire Destroyed Everything

When I stood in the kitchen for those brief few moments, so many thoughts swirled through my head. I was very aware that I might lose everything I held dear. The things I wouldn’t lose were the things that were irreplaceable. My family were all safe and my beloved dog was with me.  I already knew I had lost animals in the barn and literally everything we stored in the barn was a total loss. Our tractor, lawnmower, all the endless gadgets you keep in your barn, all gone. I looked around one final time, then joined my family on the porch, farthest from the fire.

I couldn’t watch it as it burned. My daughter videotaped it but I just stayed out of sight of the fire. I asked my kids why the fire trucks didn’t use their sirens and they looked at me like I had grown horns! They all told me that they had indeed used their sirens and the sound was deafening. Wow. I honestly never heard a siren and I never realized that it was 30 degrees out and I had a nightgown on, no coat, barefoot, no contact lenses. It is so amazing at how much you block out when you’re in a stressful and dangerous situation.

By the grace of God, they saved our house that day. I will be forever grateful. The barn burned to the ground. The siding melted on the house but there was no structural damage.

I went outside to survey the mess that was left of our barn. There were a half a dozen chickens standing in a puddle. They had some how left the burning building and survived! The smell of the burning smoldering fire would haunt me for the next several years.

When the firemen left, we went in and knelt down in the living room. I remember my husband praying, “The Lord gives and the Lord takes away, blessed be the name of the Lord “. All I could do was sob. I was so devestated from the incredible amount of loss.

The remainder of that day we built temporary shelters for the goats and chickens in the pasture farthest from the barn. I had no idea that day that it would be 2 full years before the new barn was built. I think sometimes it’s best that we don’t know how painful our trials will be.

I suffered a lot from that fire. Every morning for months I woke up at 4:10 and jumped out of bed and ran to the window. It was very traumatizing. There was a big outdoor light on the barn that came on each night at dusk. I dreaded coming home at night to the pitch dark and it was so difficult when you had to go outside.

It was definitely a trial trying to make a list of all the contents of the barn. We were told by the fire investigator the fire was caused by an electrical problem. The fire was so hot and so intense that everything was destroyed. It was heartbreaking sifting through the rubble. We saved 2 massive hinges from an upper door. John sandblasted them and repainted them. They are the only surviving thing that we were able to install on the new barn.

My next blog I will tell you about the rebuilding of our beautiful new barn.